Avoiding Summer Burnout
A blog post for Type A moms.
this is a repost I do each year in June (I wrote this in 2022).
Are you a planner? Do you plan mainly to avoid future conflict, complaining, arguments, and your own yelling? Well, if you do, welcome to the Type A mom club - I’m the president.
Simplify Summer Planning: The Ultimate Bucket List and Routine Guide for Type-A Moms
I have two kids (11 and 14) and what I have learned over a decade of parenting is: summers can suck - mainly, the life out of you. When you are a Type A mom you tend to have an inner critic who will not let you rest, and the summer can be a nightmare. Planning, keeping busy, and making sure to avoid those nasty summer words….”Mom…I’m bored!” = I’m exhausted by day 5.
Even though I am a writer, I typically go full SAHM in the summer — but not without a schedule — enter my trusty planning sheets and checklists — and lists of lists!
On the walls of the kitchen, I post the daily schedule, lists of things to do outside, one with the apps they are allowed to play and things to do when they are bored, and on and on we go.
Creating a Summer Schedule: Balancing Fun and Self-Care for Type-A Moms
And this works for our family. My kids are used to it, and the predictability of routine emotionally regulates me. The issue is…for many years, I forget to include myself in all the planning. Of course, we had fun — kids are fun in the summer — but I didn’t do the things I wanted to do, like go to the farmer’s market or to a tag sale or two, and I would end the summer with regrets.
And so I stopped doing that! For the past few years, I have printed out all our planning sheets and filled them out TOO. After all, I definitely have a summer bucket list. There are things that I want to do each week that are non-negotiables (I’m looking at you, froyo), and there are daily routines that are important to me.
This is how I plan our summers
Download the planning sheet here. The whole family fills out individual sheets — and my husband (since he works full time) fills out just the Bucket List section, which makes for some fun weekends.
List your Bucket List items.
List your weekly fun ideas.
List your daily non-negotiables
Next, organize the information. Your kids are going to come up with insane ideas on these planning sheets - that’s ok! What you want to do is look for similar themes among the insanity. Maybe everyone wants to do some water play every week - fine, it doesn’t have to be the pool or beach, but water play becomes a weekly theme.
The Bucket List gets a good look over, and then the reasonable and achievable things go onto one master list that you can print and hang up.
The Weekly Ideas go onto a weekly routine sheet or straight onto your digital calendar - Wednesdays are pool days, and Fridays are Froyo.
Then I make a daily schedule with the remaining non-negotiables - and this is where taking care of yourself comes in.
Screen Time vs. Me Time: Crafting a Daily Schedule that Works for Type-A Moms
My kids always want millions of hours of screen time - they’re preteens, I get it. I want Alone Time, Meditation Time, Journaling Time, and Writing Time - these are my things - you have your things. These two “wants” — screen time and my time — actually coincide. And so when you make your daily schedule - screen time is not cleaning time; it’s your time. Maybe they have 30 minutes to watch TV in the morning - that means you can journal or walk outside for 30 minutes.
Another non-negotiable for me during the summer is reading/downtime after big outings. And kids need this too. I always include 60 minutes of independent bedroom quiet time on my daily schedule. Even for kids that are 3 or 5 years old, you can shrink that down to 30 or 40 minutes, but everyone gets a break from one another to recharge and rest — for the good of our sanity.
Summer Cleaning Hacks: Lowering Expectations and Teaching Kids Responsibility
Then there’s the cleaning. Well, during the summer:
I lower my expectations
I use this time to teach my kids how to clean.
I am not going to use up precious screen time cleaning up clutter or emptying the dishwasher or the beach bag. I’d much rather do that while my kids are outside or playing together in the next room - or even better - clean when my partner gets home and let him take on the evening’s entertainment.
Making the Most of Summer Break = Balance Family Activities and Personal Interests
Summer Break is not a break - but it can be fun if you do the things you like to do too. So make sure you are included in the planning - and the photos too!
If you don’t hear from me for a while, it’s because I am hitting the farmer’s market and making my own jam. - Stef